Self Confidence Archives - Page 2 of 6 - Kathleen Hassan

my epic fail… and grateful for it all

I would not be able to do the work that I love, the work that I was put here to do... without YOU! I can say that today, fully understanding this connection and the value of having you in my life. But I didn’t always act that way. Let me explain. Several years ago, I hit a wall. My life and my work took a little detour. It was a significant time and it was necessary to pull back in order to recover and heal. But this, in and of itself was not my epic fail. No one goes through life unscathed and everyone at one time or another faces some obstacles on their path. No, my epic fail was believing that I had to be perfect and that I couldn’t share what was going on with me until I had put it all back together again, wrapped up in [...]

By Kathleen| 2017-03-07T12:39:02-05:00 November 26th, 2013|

Ask Kat: I Broke Up With a Guy – So Why I Am I So Sad?

Just got this great question from a girl named Nikki and figured I’d share my response to her with other girls who may have been wondering the same thing. I broke up with my bf and I thought I would feel relieved bc I lost my romantic emotions for him, but instead I'm the one bawling my eyes out. It just sucks because I do care about him, he just wasn't “the one” and I feel empty and sad. I feel like I should feel so relieved. Is it normal to feel sad even if I’m the one who left him? Dear Nikki - Of course it’s normal - you're mourning a loss. Even when you make a choice that supports your best and highest good... that doesn't mean that there isn't a time of grieving. Not so much mourning the loss of him... but mourning the loss of what you [...]

By Kathleen| 2013-11-19T21:22:57-05:00 November 19th, 2013|

Boobs, Jugs, Hooters & Tits: The Quest for the Perfect Breasts

This past weekend, I was in South Beach, Miami attending Mama Gena’s Worldwide Sister Goddess Weekend. I felt like I was magnetically pulled there. I somehow found myself on Mama Gena’s website back in July and saw the blurb about the weekend. I clicked the link and signed up without a moment’s hesitation - not knowing really anything about it nor anyone who would be there. I drove across Florida with butterflies in my stomach, feeling this intense resistance going on inside of me - knowing that I had been divinely called here and feeling so much fear at the exact same time. I have never experienced anything like it before in my life. Hundreds of bold, sexy, adventurous, outrageous women all committed to living a life unleashed and out loud. These chicks - young and old, tall and short, thin and chubby - every one of them totally owned [...]

By Kathleen| 2017-03-07T12:40:59-05:00 November 15th, 2013|

Taking the Bite Out of “The Bitch”

What comes to mind when you hear the word “bitch?” The “b word” has so much negative connotation to it and our fear of being labeled as such often keeps us toeing the line and squashing our thoughts, voices and opinions. Last night I was working with a client who is a 2nd grade teacher and currently has a student teacher in her classroom. My client was describing all the ways that this neophyte was not performing up to expectations or the standards that she has set for herself and her classroom. But rather than being strong and assertive, she had slipped into a more passive-aggressive role and was allowing the performance of this student teacher to totally affect the mood and energy of the classroom. When I asked what was the block that was preventing her from being direct and laying it on the line for this young woman, [...]

By Kathleen| 2013-10-30T18:45:17-05:00 October 30th, 2013|

Asking the Right Questions

Many years ago, at the beginning of my speaking career, I created and delivered a workshop on creativity at a Toastmasters International Conference. In my research on the topic, I read a book called Five Star Mind by Tom Wujek, and it talked about the power of questions to give your mind focus. This story is an excerpt from the book: When the Rembrandt painting "The Night Watch" was restored and returned to Amsterdam's Rijksmuseum, the curators performed a simple yet remarkable experiment. They asked visitors to submit questions about the painting. The curators then prepared answers to over fifty questions according to popularity... In a room next to the gallery which held the painting, the curators papered the walls with these questions (and answers). Visitors had to pass through this room before entering the gallery. The curious outcome was that the average length of time people spent viewing the [...]

By Kathleen| 2017-03-07T12:48:03-05:00 August 5th, 2013|

Ask Kat: Does “Fake It Till You Make It” Work?

I received an email the other day from a girl who wrote: Dear Kathleen, I love your YouTube channel and all your videos about how to be more confident. I’ve never really been very confident and want to know if you think “fake it till you make it” really works? thx Sara Dear Sara, Thank you so much for taking the time to write to me. I’m so glad my videos have helped you and that is a great question. I’ve never liked the expression “fake it till you make it” because I never want to encourage anyone to be fake - ever. I’m all about being who you really are and daring to express your thoughts and feelings even when they’re messy. This can be especially challenging if it goes against the “norm” and what everyone else is doing, but that's what builds character and what makes you - [...]

By Kathleen| 2013-07-22T20:56:53-05:00 July 22nd, 2013|

Where’s the Freaking Rainbow: Getting Through the Storms of Life

I got a message yesterday from a "friend" and he wrote "I see from Facebook you are doing well and are happy. That's so great." I responded, "Don't believe everything you see on FB!" For the most part, I am doing great and life is good. However, that doesn't mean that I don't go through my storms. I have done so much inner work to be where I am today, but every now and then, more comes up to be healed. My first response to that is "Are you shitting me? I'm fifty-freaking-seven years old and I still have work to do?" Although I've heard it a million times before (and have come to hate this expression); healing and awakening is like peeling the layers of an onion. Love it or hate it, it still rings true and can be helpful in understanding each new level. If our power was [...]

By Kathleen| 2013-06-27T22:07:39-05:00 June 27th, 2013|

Finding the Beauty Within

Real Self-Confidence Comes From Within There is nothing more beautiful than a confident woman! You can have perfect face, body, car, house and still not feel confident. It's easy to focus on everything that's wrong in the world and even easier to list all the things we don't like about ourselves. Remember - confidence and high self-esteem don’t come from false praise or taking the easy way out. Real confidence comes from hard work and from learning how to deal with life’s challenges. As a Bostonian, the horrific events at the Boston Marathon hit me hard. I knew friends and family members who had been running or watching the race and one of my son’s friends was injured in the blast. It’s been two weeks since the bombings, but the images of the blast and the media frenzy of the ensuing manhunt left so many people feeling scared and vulnerable. [...]

By Kathleen| 2017-03-07T12:54:09-05:00 May 1st, 2013|

Rape, Bullying and Another Victim of a Society Crumbling

My heart is so heavy and I am beyond sad today to learn about the tragic death of Rehtaeh Parsons. A 17 year old girl who was raped by 4 boys - who were never charged for this heinous crime. One of the boys took photos during the rape and distributed them and they went viral. Rehtaeh became the victim twice as her peers and so-called friends turned on her and labeled her a slut. She was mercilessly bullied until she couldn't take it any longer. As an advocate of teen girls and young women and as a mother of two sons, I am even more deeply committed to my work and outreach. The following is an excerpt from an interview with Rehteah's mother, Leah in the article Who Failed Rehteah Parsons? There are things to be learned from the girl’s death, Parsons said in the interview. That is why [...]

By Kathleen| 2017-03-07T12:56:44-05:00 April 10th, 2013|

Top Ten Reasons to Hire a Life Coach for Your Daughter

1. Girls need someone to talk to besides their parents and friends. As girls maneuver their way through relationships, their BFF one day can very often become their Frenemy the next. Having a coach who not only listens, but helps girls figure out their own next, best move is incredibly empowering and reassuring. 2. Every girl wants to be attractive and a good coach will help her understand that like a magnet, she can attract whatever it is that she really wants. But girls often confuse the outside external stuff with the inner force of attraction. It always comes from within. 3. Girls are often afraid to speak up and they care way too much about what everyone else thinks. Not only will a good coach help her to correctly identify her feelings and emotions, but will also help her find her voice and speak her truth about what she [...]

By Kathleen| 2017-03-07T13:36:10-05:00 March 19th, 2013|