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Confidence Tip: Avoid the Comparison Trap

Warning! Falling into the comparison trap can keep you stuck and trapped in a prison of your own making. Comparing yourself to others sets you up for a lifetime of lack. It is the energy of scarcity and will leave you always wanting more; never satisfied, never feeling good enough.   Stop comparing your insides to someone else's outsides. You never know, the girl with the new Louis Vuitton bag might be dying inside. If someone has something or some quality that you admire or wish you had, instead of getting jealous simply say, "That's for me!" When you switch your energy from envy to intention, You become a magnet and actually attract more great things into your life. "Comparison is a thief of joy." ~Theodore Roosevelt

By | 2017-03-07T14:25:37-05:00 September 20th, 2010|

Confidence Tip: Practice Positive Self-Talk

Do you talk to yourself? If you’re sitting there wondering “Do I talk to myself?” Then the answer is, YES! You just did it! Pay attention to the messages you give to yourself and be your own BFF. Talk to yourself the way you wish others would speak to you. If you catch yourself saying something negative, consciously tell yourself to stop and then replace that thought with a more positive and empowering statement such as “I am enough - just the way I am” or “I matter,” “I am loved and lovable.” We teach people how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves. You want love? Start loving yourself. Affirmations are positive statements in the present tense spoken as if they are already achieved. When practiced and repeated over time, these positive statements become new beliefs which effect our behavior and attitude and we then begin to [...]

By | 2017-03-07T14:26:34-05:00 September 14th, 2010|

Girls and Guidance

A week doesn’t go by without receiving an email (or several) from girls desperately looking for guidance. The details of their stories may differ, but the essence of each request is exactly the same: “Please help!” Help me figure out if I should tell this guy how I feel... Help me learn how to be more confident around other people... Help me figure out what my next step should be... Help me get along better with my mom. There was a time when I would personally answer each request and offer suggestions about how they might move through their challenge. This could easily have turned into a full time job if I let it, so I decided to reach more girls who might be going through the very same challenges by posting my responses on my blog or by creating videos on YouTube. Not only would I be helping more [...]

By | 2017-03-07T14:35:01-05:00 February 8th, 2010|

When the Bully is You!

And by you, I mean me. I’ve been procrastinating about writing this article for about a month now because it’s rather humbling to discover that after lecturing about self-esteem and empowerment to teen girls for over a decade that the bully was actually me. But after reading an article in the Boston Globe the other day about Phoebe Prince, a fifteen year old girl who committed suicide after being bullied at school by the so-called “mean girls,” I knew that the time had come to tell this story. I hope to shed a different light on the topic of girls and bullying in order to better understand both perspectives and to help heal both the bullies and the bullied. I’ve never been one to hop on the anti-bullying crusade because I have learned that whatever we push against, we actually bring more of the same back into our experience. In [...]

By | 2017-03-07T14:36:10-05:00 January 29th, 2010|

When Bad is So Good

What do rockers Keri Hilson, Gwen Stefani and Katy Perry have in common? Besides the obvious of being extremely talented, they have all landed on the celebrity client wish list of those "baddest" girls that up-and-coming designer, Samantha Ferguson would love to see wearing her Donnaccia clothing line.   Can't you just see Gwen Stefani or Keri Hilson rocking this skirt?   Imagine Katy Perry on the red carpet wearing this beautiful dress?   I met Samantha Ferguson while speaking at the Young Women's Leadership Conference in York, PA. Samantha is a member of SIFE (Students In Free Enterprise) and was one of the models who rocked the fashion show demonstrating how to get the look for less by consignment shopping. As always, I am so inspired and fascinated by young women with a vision which Samantha clearly has. During lunch she told me about her business and brand but [...]

By | 2017-03-07T14:36:46-05:00 December 1st, 2009|
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